This Is Not a Trap! The Rams Are Not Inferior!

No, its not, Admiral Ackbar. Why don't you do a little more planning on that Endor Special-Ops mission and a little less belittling of the 0-3 St. Louis Rams.

Calling it a trap game assumes that the Redskins are so, so, good, and the Rams are just crrrrap.  Why would anyone think that?  The Rams, literally, cannot sneak up on us.  Look up "sneak" in the dictionary.  Its not possible.

2008:  Rams 19, Redskins 17
2009:  Redskins 9, Rams 7 (the worst feeling win ever, arguably)
2010:  Rams 30, Redskins 16

LaVar Arrington: this is a game you're supposed to get.

Bullshit, dude.  Don't say that.  The Redskins must assume the highest of assumptions.  They must put the Rams on platinum jewel-encrusted pedestal.  Otherwise, its going to be a crappy punch in the stomach on Sunday again.

You Blew It!: Cowboys 18, Redskins 16

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqPRwq3QJsk

You were offered a chance to be 3-0, beat the Bama Cowboys on Monday Night Football, and you blew it.  YOU BLEW IT.

Romo was in too much pain to breathe much, his center snapped the ball at-will (of course we never recovered any of the fumbles), and the wide receivers didn't know where to run, but you blew it, Redskins coaches, you blitzed on third and a million, and you couldn't run the g-damn ball.

And Rex Grossman?  You are a friggin' horror movie.  You can only watch him peeking through the hand that his covering your eyes in sheer terror.

Without a strong running game, Rex Grossman is not going to be that great.  And by not great, I mean extremely dangerous.  Hightower couldn't get more than 2 or 3 yards a carry, so as the game went on, the play action to set up downfield passes became less and less effective.  By the end of the game, DeMarcus Ware was in the backfield ruining everything.  Grossman had 1 terrible interception, but could have had at least 2 more.


And Jim Haslett, why blitz on 3rd and 21?  Why?  We're not asking for loser-prevent defense--we're asking for normal defense.  If you give up a 16 yard pass there--that's OK!  Because 21 - 16 = 5.  Get it, Jim?  The defense kept the Cowboys out of the end zone, but we're talking about hospital bed Romo.  He could not go downfield.  His fragile state must have crept into their subconscious because they did not pummel and pound him into Romo bits.  It reminds me of that scene in Swingers--"How am I supposed to kill the bunny.  With these claws!?  How?"  They didn't destroy Romo because that would have been the obvious thing to do.

3rd and 21.  Here's the dialogue that went through my head in the 2 seconds before the ball was snapped and the ball got into Romo's hands:

How much time is going to be left when they punt it....how many timeouts...no, no, no its Romo on ESPN oh shit...shit....shit.....

So 2-1 feels like kind of crap. 

Sometimes People Let Their Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys Fans

Dear Young Child of Mine,

One day, you are going to be hanging out with your friends at school or at day camp or on the playground.  Its going to be a beautiful day.  The sun will be shining, a slight breeze in the air, low humidity. And some jerk will say, "no way, its lousy!"  Someone will wear all orange on "Wear Green Day."  During quiet study time, someone will jump up on their desk and scream, "hey teacher! teacher!  look at me.  Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

That damaged soul is a Cowboys fan.  A poisoned, screwed up, attention-starved, pathological, contrarian, ignorant, front-running, shiny object following, weak-minded, disloyal, shifty, cowardly, underhanded, lazy, obnoxious, uncouth, uneducated, illiterate, slovenly Dallas Cowboys fan.  You may pity the Dallas Cowboys fan, but you need not tolerate, accept, or respect the Dallas Cowboys fan. 

This knowledge is yours for the journey.  Love,

Dad


HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!

Well, What Do We Have Here? Redskins 22, Cardinals 21

Seriously, what do we have here?

A team that was firing on all cylinders offensively, then started turning the ball over and having kicks blocked, then recovered and took the lead, then blew it by letting the opponent's best player get wide open for a long bomb touchdown, then rallying for two scoring drives late in the 4th quarter to win by one point.

Everyone's saying we would have lost this game last year.  I'm not so sure about that.  Some people and things get used to dysfunction and drama, and need it, like Ricky Bobby's dad in that Will Ferrell movie who couldn't resist starting a fight in an Appleby's once everything seemed to fall into place.  The dysfunctional Redskins won some of these crazy games because they had become used to craziness, and then would get blown out 80-13 the next week.

But when they won those crazy games, it took crazy stuff to get points, like when DeAngelo Hall stripped Tashard Choice and scored on the last play of the first half in Week 1 last year; or the offense would score on the first drive and then shut it down, and then count on long punt returns, interceptions, and field goals to squeak by.

This year's offense, at least with regard to first downs and yardage, plays 4 quarters, and they get first downs with young running backs, long throws downfield, and conversions on third and long.

Historically, when the Redskins have taken the opening kickoff, moved it down to the red zone methodically, and then thrown a terrible noodle armed indecisive pick at the goal line blowing a chance at easy points, its a psychological burden that lingers.  Everyone is thinking we should have more points now, if only....  Like Seinfeld said, its a big matzoh ball hanging out there.

It was 10-7 at the half following another Sleepy Davis touchdown, but everyone was still thinking about those other points that got away.

With the score 14-13, Kolb rolled to his right, planted, and released deep a split second before he got crushed from behind.  And there he was, Larry Fitzgerald, only the absolute best player in the stadium that no one should ever lose track of, wide open and running into the end zone. 

But Rex came right back.  We all agreed Rex was not going to be afraid.  He's not the type of person who worries about his hand after he's burned it on the stove.

On 4th and 3, he decided not to throw to the wide open guy in the flat, and opted to go for it all.  Moss scored, and they eventually went on to win after Bryon Westbrook caused a fumble on the Cardinals' last drive.

So we're 2-0, which is awesome, but despite all the buzz, the Cardinals game doesn't feel like we've really turned the page.  Its going to take a decisive victory against Dallas for that to happen.

Welcome to the Party Pal: Redskins 28, Giants 14

Last year, when Shanahan benched McNabb in the 4th quarter at Detroit and replaced him with Rex Grossman, we all thought, "this is the dumbest thing I have ever seen in football."

Last December, when Shanahan permanently benched McNabb and replaced him with Rex Grossman, to "see what we had there," we all thought, "holy shit, how bad is our team?  And how bleak is the future?  Oh, despair!"

Last April, when Shanahan decided not to draft a rookie quarterback when we could have had Blaine Gabbert, we all thought, "Rex Grossman is going to be our starting quarteback?"  No, other people said, "John Beck is going to be our quarterback."  All the people thought, "Gee whiz, I don't care if the lockout never ends."

But last Sunday, when Rex Grossman threw his second touchdown pass of the game to go up 28-14 against the g-damn Giants on opening day, we all said "yeaaahhhhhhhhhhh!" and woke up the baby.

The newest member of Redskins Club.  As Bruce Willis told the LAPD after throwing a German dude out a window, "Welcome to the party, pal!"   Like it or not, you're a Redskins fan, kid.  Its a tough road to walk, but there's a great support network. 

The running game showed potential with Hightower, who has a lot more speed than Portis has had the last couple of seasons.  However, it was Rex's arm and chemistry with several different receivers that made the difference.  Even Sleepy Davis continued to improve, making several big time catches for first downs while absorbing hits.

He knew he was gonna get hit! (Dan Dierdorf)

The fade pass to Armstrong to tie the game at 14 before the half was huge!

On defense, we looked worlds better than last year simply because we have better pieces for 3-4, and because we have guys who are hungry like Chris Neild (the second to last player drafted this year) as opposed to dudes who already ate (Haynesworth).

Rookie Ryan Kerrigan made an excellent first impression by batting down and catching Eli Manning pass in the third quarter and returning it for what turned out to be the winning touchdown. 

Back to Rex Grossman.  Most people still think he is way too dangerous and sloppy with the ball to feel relieved and/or excited about himbeing THE guy.  Look at his record.  He earned that reputation.  But can he continue to be effective?  Can he be a guy who makes 3-4 great downfield completions or touchdowns for every 1 mistake?  Can his burden be lightened if Hightower/Torain/Helu and the stretch plays improve?  Hell yes.