This Year's Redskins Answer the Question Whaaaat? Lions 37, Redskins 25

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRPpvefxLCA

What a wild weekend of soccer, birthday dinners, naps, and the schitzo Washington Redskins went up to Detroit trying find some kind of identity and a win before going into the bye week. Instead, McNabb threw a terrible interception with a five point lead less than five minutes left. The flood gates opened, the Skins lost, and McNabb got benched because Mike Shanahan thought Rex Grossman would give us a better chance to win. Yeah. Crazy.

Thanks to long punt and kickoff returns from Brandon Banks, the Skins had a chance to win, up 25-20 with 5 minutes left in the 4th. As the Lions punted, I said, "It would really be great for us to get an offensive touchdown, for our confidence (because of course this game was totally ours and nothing bad was going to happen.)

But then McNabb, on 2nd and 10, threw into triple coverage for an interception, and minutes later, Calvin Johnson scored his third touchdown of the game on 4th and 1.

Then, down 31-25, the Skins had one last chance. But with no timeouts, Shanahan thought now's the perfect time to bring out Rex Grossman. First Shanahan justified it by saying Grossman knows the 2 minute drill terminology. Then he said its because McNabb was kind of beat up. Then he said its because Rex is in better shape.

The reaction has been unanimous--what a total cluster eff, because not only did we blow a chance to be 5-3 at the bye, we added a completely unnecessary distraction about McNabb's future and the coaching staff's faith in him.

The only possible silver lining is that this lights a fire under McNabb's ass who, let's face it, has been generally crappy this year. His saving grace has been being able to hit a few long ones each game.

Now, bye week. Kind of sick of this up and down team at the moment.

Winning the Battle of Who Could Care Less: Redskins 17, Bears 14

9 Turnovers. Cutler threw 4 picks to DeAngelo Hall, one for a 92 yard game winning touchdown. McNabb threw 2 picks, one returned for a touchdown. Two Ryan Torain fumbles. Cutler got stripped at the goal line. A third McNabb interception for a TD got called back, thankfully, because McNabb was too slow with the play and got called for delay of game.

So these two teams were pretty awful, and neither deserved to win. But DeAngelo Hall put the Redskins on his back and made the big plays.

After McNabb threw his pick 6, he came back and led a really nice drive culminating in a post pattern touchdown to Moss. But McNabb either starts crappy-- throwing ducks and overthrows and then rallies--or he puts together a nice drive getting the lead, showing flashes of competence, and then calls it a day.

When the Skins were up 10-7 and Cutler was playing crappy, Kyle and McNabb teamed up for a 3 or 4 three-and-outs in a row, making it impossible to pull away.

Early in the third Q, with the Bears up 14-10. the football gods conspired to keep us alive.

It was first and goal. Cutler sneaked it, extended the ball so that it was arguably over the white chalk of the goal line.

All of a sudden, Haynesworth and Fletcher come flying through and the ball gets knocked out, Redskins recovered. (Haynesworth, by the way was a world wrecker. On one play, he literally drove the guy blocking him straight backwards and into Jay Cutler for a sack)

However, McNabb got picked off again, by DJ Moore again, and he walked right in the end zone for the score. Double however, the play clock ran out. Delay of game--no play! Sweet incompetence!

So we punted. And someone must have been listening to me because Hunter Smith did not punt to Devin Hester once. Not once. Smith repeatedly punted out of bounds, sometimes comically for a total of 20 yards. But it was the right strategy. Hester's freakish awesomeness often bails out Cutler.

And yet, there were drives where Cutler looked pretty sharp on the two and three step drops. But on a third down, Cutler went all "eff it, dude" put up a back foot lob throw to the sideline that Hall snatched with one hand and took it all the way down the sideline for the winning score.

Ryan Torain made some great runs late in the 4th, putting him over 100 yard again, but he fumbled twice--once in the red zone.

Its great to get the win. I was completely certain that we were going to lose the game right before the early third quarter deux ex machina/shenanigans that kept Chicago off the scoreboard.

Instead, we get to 4-3, which is pretty awesome for an NFC team this year. We have a QB that plays well for a bit before calling it a day; a defense that gives up a ton of yards but is learning to strip and intercept; and a team that is getting the breaks. Its nice for a change.

Don't Punt to Devin Hester/Don't Put Salt In Your Eyes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_83MEuLoz9Y

This Kids in the Hall skit reminds me of the problem posed by Devin Hester returning punts, and the teams that insist on doing so.

Why Is Everyone So Wide Open!: Colts 27, Redskins 24

Look at this dog. This dog, like me, is pissed off at the following:

1. Carlos Rogers can't catch. Yeah, we know he really can't catch, But SERIOUSLY, Carlos Rogers can't catch! He literally can't! And neither could Kareem Moore. You can't drop interceptions and hope to still beat Peyton Manning.

2. McNabb--slant passes are great. You have to react fast and really zip the ball in to your receiver in a tight space. Its an effective play. But its very hard to do well if you throw the g-d damn ball before you even turn your head to look at where you are throwing. When you do that, you can very well throw an interception! Are you kidding me! You are making this dog very upset!




3. Cover your man--no one cares if you're playing zone. The scoreboard doesn't care, I don't care. The dog sure as hell doesn't care. See that guy run past you? That's Austin Collie. Chances are Peyton Manning's gonna throw that ball to him, not that patch of grass you're standing on. Cover your man.

4. Joseph Addai--breaking tackles and running for 46 yards after we pull within 3? WTF, dude. Don't you see we have our hands full with your QB? Give it a rest, will you? Jeez.

5. But what I still can't get over is that Third and 1 sweep toss play early in the 4th quarter, just after Fletcher knocked out Addai, causing a fumble, with the Skins down by 7. We had all the momentum on our side.

It was third and inches after a completion to Sleepy Davis. Instead of a quick hitting play--QB sneak, something behind the Guard/Center/Mike Sellers, Kyle called a toss sweep to the left.

Torain was great, but he's not that fast, and that play takes a long ass time to develop and forces the runner to be running sideways, not up the field trying to get those couple of inches. It completely the advantage of needing a short distance for the first down. He was tackled behind the line. HOLY #@$%.


Some Good Things:

-Cris Collinsworth: I could spend months here (Washington, D.C.) just going to museums and...
Joey: Oh shut up, Cris Collinsworth, you can't even read!

-Torain broke a lot of tackles and looked generally awesome.

-Orakpo's sack and fumble. Huge play at the time.

-Landry and Buchanon's defense late in the game, causing a three and out, giving McNabb one more chance. Too bad Kyle was calling the plays for that drive too.

Brothers in Arms: Redskins 16, Packers 13 OT

"Game Over"--Dad

"Its still a long one."--Me

"We need a turnover."--Steve

Another classic Washington, D.C. weekend in October. Just beautiful. Rainbows are shooting out of my [ears]. Check out this rocket of a goal:

The moral of the story is when your first attempt is a lame dribbler mis-hit, and somehow, inexplicably, you get a second opportunity to grasp glory by the tail, you take that opportunity and crank that junk right past the goalie and silently scream an obscenity to yourself!

That's just what the Redskins did against the Green Bay Packers today. They pretty much stunk in the first half, particularly on offense. They couldn't really run, no one was getting open, Clay Matthews Jr. was making our o-line look like dog food, and we gained negative 20 yards after snatching a fumble and taking possession in the red zone early in the game.

But they stayed in it. A huge play was stopping Green Bay on 4th and goal in the first half when Lorenzo Alexander went out in coverage and prevented the tight end from scoring on the play action.

McNabb was overthrowing and underthrowing and running for his life, but somehow, on a 3rd and 12, scrambled around and found Moss on a long sideline route, and that led to a field goal.

This is kind of what McNabb did to us. Stink a whole bunch, but then make an extremely consequential play.

Burgers at halftime were excellent. Compliments to the chef(s).

So, the first half was a lame dribbler to the goalie, but because the Packers couldn't pull away, the Redskins got a second kick at the ball. Up 13-3, the Packers got stopped on third and 1, and then missed a really long field goal, pushed right. Still alive, but down by 10 at the start of the 4th quarter.

McNabb hit not really all that old man Joey Galloway for a first down, and then went down town like a satisfactory Red Line train, to Anthony Armstrong on a deep post jump ball. Outstanding ups and hand strength to haul that one in.

After another stop, McNabb drove 'em close, but not really close enough. Gano pushed a field goal wide right.

Thanks to an-all out jail house blitz and a sack by Fletcher on the next possession, the Skins got it back down by 3. A Cooley catch n'rampage (3 broken tackles) got us within FG range.

Gano barely snuck it in. I don't know how that ball stopped its initial desire to slice, but it was good.

GB had a chance to win. After, the completion to the 35, Dad said game over. But the Packers had no timeouts left and couldn't run an additional play. Its still pretty long, I said.

It looked perfect. High, and straight down the middle. But when it reached its peak, it began to move.

DOINK

In OT, LaRon Landry snatched an errant pass from concussed Aaron Rodgers, and returned it into field goal range.

And Gano Made it.

Man, am I tired.

After losing to the Rams, I thought we'd need to find a way to win two of the next three games against seemingly excellent opponents:--Philly, Green Bay, and the Colts if we wanted the relevant portion of the season to extend indefinitely.

Well, we got our two.

And by the way, the Colts aren't that great this year. No one is great this year. The Atlanta Falcons have the best record in the NFC right now, tied with maybe the worst 4-1 team ever, the Chicago Bears.

Its wide open.

October Should Be Savored Like a Fine Wine

October is the Best.

The BEST!

McNabb/Redskins 17, McNabbless Eagles 12

"Well, well, well. How the turntables..."--Michael Scott

"How does it feel, Philadelphia!?"--Me

This one goes out to Donovan McNabb. That other team didn't treat you right, girl. I know we had our ups and downs in the past, girl, but its gonna be alright, girl.

"I came along when he broke your heart

That's when you needed someone

To help forget about him

I gave you love with a brand new start

That's what you needed the most

To set your broken heart free

I know you cried, and you felt blue

But when I could I gave strength to you

I'm waiting for the day when you can love again"--Beach Boys
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBi5eHfqW5s

Thanks to a power running game, some timely down field passes, a very physical and smart defense, and a sandwich tackle that put Michael Vick in the MRI room, the Redskins secured Donovan McNabb's revenge, won 17-12, and put the Redskins into first place in the NFC East with a 2-0 division record.

It was really a pretty perfect October weekend. Metro FC, my soccer team, took advantage of its fourth chance to beat The Stove--a team that is very good and really ticks me off. When it was 1-1 in the second half, I personally took advantage of a high, under-kicked lead pass, slowly dribbled it to the 18 yard box, and banana-ed it around the goalie and into the far pocket. We won 4-1.

Then I went to see Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps at the Uptown. It wasn't as great as I hoped, and it did a pretty weak job explaining how banks hedged against the toxic assets they forced the rating companies to say were solid investments, or show real people suffering from this fraud, but Michael Douglas was excellent.

At Redskins Club, we tossed the ball around in the drive way. Steve broke out the old Stevie pattern which is completely indefensible due to the presence of zero pass rush.

When we played at Ayrlawn back in '86 or so, we were coached to run 8 step down and outs, 14 step down and overs, button-hooks, post patterns, fly patterns, fades, zig-outs, slant--all the things wide receivers are coached to do.

This was nonsense, according to Steve, who was determined to run all over the field, in circles, doubling back, doing triple fakes, like a deranged honey bee, until after three minutes he would call for the ball. If it was late in the day, I'd let him catch it so he wouldn't throw a tantrum.

As for the game, the Skins started fast, thanks to a big Brandon Banks punt return and a horse collar penalty. Then Ryan Torain trucked an Eagles safety, making it 7-0.

The team out-hit the Eagles--whether it was Torain taking out this guy, DeAngelo Hall and Kareem Moore sandwiching Michael Vick and busting his ribs, or Lorenzo Alexander crushing a guy on a kick return.

On the next drive, McNabb hit Cooley on a perfect play action pass for a touchdown.

McNabb could have had a second td pass when it was 14-3 as Armstrong got super duper wide open, but the ball trailed to the right and Armstrong stumbled out of bounds after he caught it. The Skins had first and goal at the 3, but wouldn't you know it, Kyle Shanahan called two gadget players for Brandon Banks (clearly a big time red zone threat historically). Why not just keep

trucking people with Ryan Torain? I don't get it at all.

The Eagles had a chance to pull within a TD late in the 2nd quarter, but 10 minutes of lag time from a booth review wasn't enough time for nobel prize in physics winner Andy Reid, and a delay of game penalty forced them to kick a FG instead.

The rest of the game was kind of annoying as McNabb went for 2-8 and the Skins seemed content to run the game out. McNabb scrambled for a first down late in the fourth but then ran out of bounds. "Rocks for brains!" Those precious seconds mattered, because of course, on the last drive, Carlos Rogers dropped another game-ending interception. So Kevin Kolb had one play from the 35. The ball fell into Jason Avant's hands, but the laws of physics were on our side as he tried to bring it in because the ball popped free was caught by DeAngelo Hall. Game OVER!

Good Things:

-Ryan Toran's bruising running style

-Portis looked better

-Defense held the Eagles to 1 touchdown, great pass coverage

-Orakpo continues to get held. I hope he doesn't have a contract escalator based on the number of sacks he gets because he's getting screwed if that's the case

-Brandon Banks is a dangerous punt returner

Bad Things:

-Brandon Banks is a dangerous punt returner

-Kyle Shanahan's red zone playcalling is still inexcusably horrible

-Stephon Heyer is a major liability

-Sleepy Davis thinks stopping in his tracks is the best way to catch up with a strongly thrown ball

-McNabb running out of bounds

We Reach an Early Fork in the Road: Forkadelphia

One road involves not being able to tackle Michael Vick, not being able to run for first downs, McNabb not being able to control his emotions and secure some revenge: a lonely dark path downhill, with thorns and rabid squirrels, to 1-3.

The other road? Dropped punts by DeSean Jackson, Vick slant passes finding the #59 of London Fletcher's jersey, Chris Cooley being targeted in the end zone. Glorious sunshine in early October: a 2-2 record, first place, with 2 division wins.

Let us choose the righteous path.